Wednesday, May 27, 2009

World’s oldest sloth found

What the?

Hana is always on the lookout for amazing things, and today she found something very excellent. This is a site talking about the startling discovery of the oldest sloth bones ever.

This is a megtherium, which is a giant sloth. Hands like a shovel and teeth like a shovel, that is the giant sloth.  Giant sloths ate trees whole and could bunch the living daylights out of anyone.  But they were so peaceful that they just sat around all day doing tai chi and thinking up new tree recipes.  They could grow to enormous heights, and were extremely cool, but they went extinct because they were all nihilists.  Basically one day one giant sloth woke up and looked around and he said “guys, we are the coolest animal…..ever.”  All of the other sloths thought “yeah that’s true.”  From that point on there wasn’t much point evolving or anything because they had already achieved the pinnacle of what was possible for carbon-based life forms.  So the megatheria just sort of gave up.  They didn’t shovel up any more trees or do tai chi anymore.  And that was okay, because in the end they were right about being the coolest animal, and there really isn’t that much for them these days.